The likeability factor and why it does’t matter.

likeI was thinking about a professional relationship I currently have, it’s not one I would consider positive and based on the behavior or the other person involved, I had come to the conclusion that she doesn’t like me. In retaliation, I decided to dislike her back.

While reflecting on this, I came to the conclusion that I don’t really need to reciprocate her feelings towards me. I don’t have to dislike someone because of my charms are lost to them.

Moreover, I don’t really know if she dislikes me or not for sure. For all I know, her lack of warmth could indicate neutrality.

Further, I thought about how she makes me feel which is…which is….really in my power, It dawned on me – nobody can make me feel a particular way. How I feel, respond and internalize things is a choice. I can choose to feel however I want.

The final realization, which kicked me in the pants, was that maybe I’m being harsh and not liking myself and because of this I look for external sources to validate my own disapproval of myself.

I have been cutting myself some slack. I have been in my industry for just over two years. I’m going to make mistakes, not know things and will have to wait my turn for promotions.

Your Likeability Factor is important – to a certain extent. And the most important person who you need to impress is yourself.

 

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